Day Sixteen 2019

Should I Call You?


Should I call you when he spits at me?
It’s not a real crime though can’t you see?

Should I call you when he urinates on me?
It’s not a real crime though can’t you see?

Should I call you when he humiliates me?
It’s not a real crime though can’t you see?

Should I call you when he’s spent all my money and left me and the kids none?
It’s not a crime though – nothing can be done.

Should I call you when he’s telling me no one will believe me?
He said he’d tell you I’m proper crazy.

Should I call you when he screams ‘you fucking bitch I want you dead’?
But it’s only words that he’s said?

Should I call you when I daren’t say no to him in bed?
Wouldn’t make any difference ‘I’m his’ he said.

Should I call you when he says ‘I’m following you’?
What on earth can you really do?

If I call you I’ll lose the kids, the man I love, my whole life….
I just want to be a good devoted wife.

‘It’s a domestic the police won’t give a shit’,
He says every time after I have been hit.

He’s not scared of you, doesn’t give a shit what you say…..
Will do it all again the very next day.

He’s sorry, life will get better can’t you see!?
Don’t interfere and make trouble for me.

You gave him ‘words of advice’, what did you expect that to do?
Strangle me until I turned blue?

I need you to deal with him, believe the things I say,
Not just remove him and him be home the next day.

Understand how frightened I am, all the things he’s done and said.
Yes I do really believe that one day I’ll be dead.

Day Thirteen 2019

In A World…


In a world of silent screams and broken dreams
Oppression crowding our isolation
And darkness clouding our devastation

In a world where no one sees nor yet believes
Imprisoned by those bruiseless blows
But no one knows how deep it goes

In a world where joy is an object to destroy
Our breath just brushing past the lung
Like a hollow song unsung

Amidst this there is a wondrous find
A place to leave it all behind
To rise above the silent screams that echo in those broken dreams

To relish things which still remain, beyond the memory of the pain
To reach for joy and breathe deep once more
To feel life ebbing within our core

Such is the place found through Voices
A revelation that we still have choices
Freedom to Love and Live and Be is now so possible for those like me!

Day Eleven 2019

A Poem


We embrace in a hug
A split second later I hear the words ‘We all have to go now’
As hands clenching around my neck getting tighter
Hands burst open I become a fighter
I see the monster in your eyes
Devil in your lies
Pushing harder to set us free
Grabbing anything I see you to get you off me
Run run run we have to be free
Door opens then closes
Darkness evades my eyes
Legs running faster through the darkness
All of a sudden I see the light
Free from the pain free to be me again

Day Ten 2019

Salty Tears


Salty tears sting my face
Welling up from some dark place
Crushed down low they were placed
to help me cope in that hopeless place

Broken, lifeless lay my soul
To the point I was almost
No more!!
BUT Voices head my cry, my plea for sanity
For love, acceptance
For understanding all of me

The Freedom Programme was put in place
Laughter, love and clarity
Laughter lit the once dark place, resolve
Hope and love were put back into their rightful place

Weighed down with grief and sorrow
Loneliness and no hopes for tomorrow
Tortured daily by my ex – he’s looking for the cracks within
To slowly steal my soul, my heart, my joy within

Beaten down “YES” but “NO” longer as
And even though I’m not quite there
I know the volunteers always care

Cake is the order of the day
To take the sadness away
Chocolate, biscuits by the tonne
Which doesn’t help my bum
Who cares when the company is so much fun!!!!

I will have my day and he will pay for his cruel wicked ways
Emptiness will stay with him
A monster he carries within
You get back what you’ve put in

Day Nine 2019

Pearls Before Swine


Don’t throw your pearls before swine they say
But we ladies do it every day
We give our virtues away
Freely given
Because we are so smitten

Boundaries are the only way
To keep the swine at bay
Our virtues will stay intact
Hopefully to live a life that’s not crap

Be on your guard
From men who wish to gain
From our loving, generous ways
But heed the warning
Don’t fall for a narcissist and his cunning ways
Or in the future you will lack
The will to fight back from all the blows
The mental trauma he sows
Boundaries are the only way!!

Day Eight 2019

No Contact


Far from home I’ve had to go
Leave my family, my home
Go no contact is the way
To stay safe all day
He hounds me night and day
I’m lonely and afraid
But going no contact is the only way
My resolve was weak but now it’s strong
I understand being meek was not wrong
But kindness, love and respect
Wasn’t what you get
Remember, go no contact every day
Find your friends again, stay in touch
They will give you much
Kindness and the human touch
But go no contact every day
Or the pain won’t go away
the pain subsides from inside
Peace emerges in the main
Life starts once again.